Saturday, July 24, 2010
(art: N.C. Wyeth)
The following Tale was found among the papers of the late Diedrich Knickerbocker, an old gentleman of New York, who was very curious in the Dutch history of the province, and the manners of the descendants from its primitive settlers.
Friday, July 23, 2010
The sight of Ed's empty food bowl...He was always fed from a small bowl in the front room. Ed's little white food bowl, with green trimming around the rim, bits of dried cat food stuck to the sides, is still on a shelf in the front room.
The ancient Egyptians went into mourning for the loss of a cat and shaved their eyebrows. And why shouldn't the loss of a cat be as poignant and heartfelt as any loss? Small deaths are the saddest, sad as the death of monkeys.
Toby Tyler cuddles the dying monkey in his arms.
The old farmer stands by the unfinished wall.
The pictures are engravings in old books.
The books crumble to dust.
I mis ed more for his acts of mischief than his endearing moments. Yesterday I had bought cat food. (Ed has been missing now for about twenty-four hours. No, more like forty-eight now. We got back from Paris on Friday the thirteenth and he had just slipped away two hours before that.) I used to put cans of cat food on the windowsill over the sink and Ed would get up on the sill and knock the cans down into the sink. A terrible clatter would wake me up. What have you done now, Ed? A broken dish, a glass knocked to the floor and broken...So I started to put the cans into the cabinet, where he wouldn't have access. Now, as I am taking the cat food out of my shopping bag, I look at the sill and think, Well, I can put the cans up there now. And at this moment I feel a sharp pang of loss, the loss of a loved presence, however small...the little cry he made when I carried him away from bothering Ruski...a pang of loss, of absence, the loss of my little white monkey beast (as I called him). He was always into everything. I'd open the drawer where the cutlery was kept and he would climb up and slide into the drawer. Where is he now? I have put the cat food cans back on the window, still hoping he will come back and knock them over. And the last two nights I've kept the porch lights on.