Daniel Charms, 31 Plays, #22

What Is Sold In Stores These Days

Koratigin went to Tikakeev's but Tikakeev was not home.

At the time, Tikakeev was in a store buying sugar, meat and cucumbers.

Koratigin stood at Tikakeev's door for a while and was about to leave a note, when suddenly saw Tikakeev carrying a plastic bag.

Koratigin sees Tikakeev and yells at him: - I've been waiting for you for a whole hour!

- This can't be true, - says Tikakeev, - I left my house not more than twenty five minutes ago.

- Well, I don't know how could that happen, - said Koratigin,- I've been standing here for an hour.

- Stop lying! - said Tikakeev. - It's rather shameful to lie.

- My lord! - said Koratigin. - Would you please be more careful choosing your words.

- I think... - Tikakeev starts saying, but is interrupted by Koratigin.

- Well if you think... - he says, but Koratigin is interrupted by Tikakeev who says:

- Let me tell you what you really are!

These words infuriates Koratigin so much that he closes one of his nostrils with his finger and blows his nose through the other one right at Tikakeev.

Then, Tikakeev takes out of his bag the biggest cucumber and hits Koratigin in the head.

Koratigin grabs himself by the head, falls down and dies.

That big of a cucumber is sold in stores these days!